Why, Mr. Franklin! Are You Sure It's Legit?!

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Why, Mr. Franklin! Are You Sure It's Legit?!
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It's from a group that calls itself the Publishers Clearing House....it seems we may have already won two million dollars in their sweepstakes.

Thy Art Nothing But A Temptress!

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Thy Art Nothing But A Temptress!
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I said 'no.' Then why are you trying to drive me mad by exposing those luscious ankles?

All Of The Unwed Maidens, Promptly Raise Thy Hands Into The Air

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All Of The Unwed Maidens, Promptly Raise Thy Hands Into The Air
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If only I hadst but placed a silver circlet upon her finger, for verily did I enjoy it.