I'll wash that face right off your head.
What's spiny and slippery and smells a little like Christmas? Soap shaped like a hedgehog! Good thing it's not very pointy, bath time could get scary.
Why wash your hands with a boring little nub of Ivory when you have choices like these?
Repeat after me: I will not eat the soaps, I will not eat the soaps, I will not eat the soaps!
Does your heart die a little when you have to throw away that last little sliver of soap? Now you can save it! You have now personally solved all our ecological problems!
I hope these soaps come with a flavor map in the box because if I start using one and discover it's coconut inside, I'm throwing it right over the shower curtain.
Come to the Dark Side of the powder room sink.