All your one-handed pirate friends will love coming to BBQs at your house!
Got a Mean Girls themed party to go to? Thrown on some owl eyes and lingerie and you're set!
All the boredom with none of the (un)intentional groping!
Pine needles are messy, plus, what are you supposed to do with a wreath after Christmas? This is no fuss and silly to boot!
These penguins are so round, it looks as if they've had too many cookies themselves! Roly poly birdies, are you just going to slide all lazy-like on your bellies to the water? Are those hair bows waterproof?
I suppose if you can't afford a butler to twirl your ice cream for you, an automatic cone will have to do.