I'm so nice. I'd be perfect for them. Why don't the girls like me? Proverbs 32:1-Nice guys finish last.
That's not how you roll a joint. Shut up. I know how to roll a joint.
THE HAMMOCK. Invented because someone was too lazy to drag their bed to the back yard.
To obtain acorns: whack asparagus with bacon
The pizza guy said FREE TOPPINGS if I answer the door dressed like this!!
When Mormons discovered space travel.
I dunno about these ones. Should I throw 'em back in or what? Nah, I have some rain gutters that could stand some cleaning.
Thy Direct TV bill has a $35.00 charge for " Ladies Figgy Pudding Wrestling" -gulp-
Jack and Jill went up the hill.... Jill got the inheritance!
Where's Judas? Say that Jesus! Say where's Judas!
It's the reason I get out of bed every afternoon!
It's flavored with my bitter tears.
It's going to take a while to fill this up.