Editor's Note: Contains foul language.
The Onion articulates the feelings I have about hipster weddings that I've been bottling up in a precious mason jar for so long.
Smeezle says: "We weren't content just to watch the display, we wanted to play with the pretty fire too!"
Watch it, she can get a little salty at times. Just don't agitate her too much.
Thank you, sir, for kindly protecting your poor naked wife from the prying eyes of the camera.
That hair! Those ankle socks! That cane! It's pure perfection!
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