New from Johnson & Johnson the Tear-Pump doesn't smudge your make-up
-Tina Fey, Amy Poehler
What kind of people just have sex with their blinds open?! Some weirdos could be watching them and they wouldn't even notice!
-James Marsden, Tina Fey
She gives the best massages but do NOT ask for a Happy Ending.
I found it hiding in the vents. And into the trash it goes.
-Tina Fey, Justin Bieber
"P.S. I Love You" is so sad. No one should have to be married to Gerard Butler or Hilary Swank.
(Tina Fey, Bradley Cooper)
Create a caption for tonight's 84th Annual Academy Awards here!
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