The Real World St. Thomas: "Chicken Abuse and Broken Dreams”

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The Real World St. Thomas finale (aired 9/12) involves chicken abuse (Swift), a guy almost sh*ting his pants during a parade (Trey), drunken gorilla dancing (Marie at a bar), pole dancing (Laura at a bar), and yellow vomit spewing over the side of a boat (all the cast members).

Details about the chickens: to get back at the girls (Marie and LaToya) for a prank, Swift decides to forcibly kidnap two St. Thomas chickens and hide them in his roommates' beds. "I hope LaToya doesn't jump on them!" he says excitedly. So then of course LaToya comes in and jumps on them. Upon being discovered, the chickens emerge with bald patches and expressions of terror (if chickens can have expressions). They are technically alive, but holding on by a thread.

After the closing credits, MTV offers a message of reassurance for the audience: "No chickens were harmed in the implementation of Swift's pranks. They continue to run free in St. Thomas." I'd like to tweak the message, slightly: "Wild chickens were chased down by a Real World cast member, squeezed, probed, man-handled, wrestled into a taped up box, transported on a boat, hidden under thick blankets as a hilarious "joke", trampled on by multiple drunkards (Ha ha! It's a PRANK! FUNNY!), and finally "released' back into the wild. No chickens were killed during filming of this episode, though they probably died from stress shortly after being 'freed'."

Read more about dead chickens and drunk douchebags at Real Housewives Real Professor!

Project Runway: “Print Challenge Equals Hideous Fashions”

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Interesting moment from Project Runway, Season 10, Episode 9 (air 9/13):

According to Tim Gunn, designer Ven Budhu's dress, detailed with pink and white flower patterns, appears to be covered in used maxi pads. "It's like an homage to a menstrual cycle," he says sadly. EWWWW. C'mon, Tim! Ven changes the dress into something like a set of human conjoined twins: one dress on the bottom and one dress on top. I'd rather wear a cute dress that looks like a maxi pad than a hideous dress that doesn't look like a maxi pad. Just saying.

I guess Tim Gunn has seen a number of used maxi pads in his lifetime?

Read more about maxi pads and designer Gunnar buying his mom a boob job at Real Housewives Real Professor!

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