The "Jurassic Park" Promotional Newsletter

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Here's a really amazing newsletter for some eccentric billionaire's dinosaur theme park that will be totally safe, thanks to the technical prowess of his morbidly obese son.

I really don't see "Jurassic Park" becoming more popular than Disney World, unless the park gets some good reviews from a few plucky little scientists, botanists and chaoticians. Without that, this park is nothing more than a magnificent game preserve of incredibly dangerous animals!

Good luck with your park, Dr. Hammond!

C'mon Kid! Take The Bait...

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Get some Reese's Pieces. That'll draw him out. -Jurassic Park

Download the new Cheezburger app for a chance to win a PS4! in Cheezburger 's Hangs on LockerDome