"When I was a boy, I had to walk five miles to the nearest cocaine." -Jack Nicholson

That's the last bedtime story I'm reading you kids tonight. NOW GO THE F@#K TO SLEEP ! -Jack Nicholson

Ha Ha, you're right! I woulda made a good Wolverine. (Jack Nicholson)

u mad (Jack Nicholson)

Alcoholics Anonymous: I have a good feeling about my new sponsor. (Jack Nicholson)

His milkshake brings ALL the boys to the yard... until they realize those are man boobs. (Jack Nicholson)