Why wash your hands with a boring little nub of Ivory when you have choices like these?
Make sure you eat breakfast before you take a shower, this baby isn't edible.
Is your bathroom trash heap themed? Do you collect stray cats and old food remnants? Boy do I have a bar of soap for you!
My hands will smell so majestic after I wash them with a unicorn!
Repeat after me: I will not eat the soaps, I will not eat the soaps, I will not eat the soaps!