Gents, do you miss kissing your ladyfriend who refuses to let your boar-bristle toothbrush of a mustache near her delicate skin? Solutions all up in this place!
Oh mustache candy, you are so dapper!
Well aren't you the most dapper aquatic mammal I've ever seen?
Not a bad idea, Kitty, my lip does get a little chilly in the winter.
A mustache says a lot about a man. And a fridge.
I always felt my rude gestures could use a bit of class.