These are some intense fisticuffs right here.
I'm sorry to make breakfast so traumatic but this little bear just BEGGED me to have his plea for mercy posted on the site. I can't promise that be escaped unscathed but you can help prevent atrocities like this in the future. Only eat foods shaped like inanimate objects!
From now on I demand that a tiny, pink fondant bear with a bow on her head on everything I eat. I want every restaurant to know I'm coming so it will be on my pad see ew when I get there. I don't think I'll eat her, maybe my personal assistant can carry her around for me. She doesn't even have to be edible. But she does have to be adorable.